Vengeance
by Abyssal Ferret
Summary: The battle of the Collectors is complete, but to what cost? When Shepard is faced with a disapproving Miranda, she makes a new and capable enemy... and sparks will surely fly. Renegade. Femshep/Garrus pairing.
1. The Disagreement

_Shepard, Miranda, Grunt, Garrus and Zaeed are the only ones to survive the suicide mission.__ Based off a playthrough which ended with renegade FemShep/ Garrus and giving Cerberus the Collector Base. Shepard's background is Earthborn/Sole Survivor, and because of this hates Cerberus, particularly developing animosity with Miranda. Her name is Jane, although she has a custom appearance w/ blonde long hair tied up in a bun. Shepard had planned all her squad' deaths with the exception of Zaeed and Garrus, but failed in her plans and Miranda and Grunt also survived (they were holding off the door with just the two of them, which Shepard supposed wouldn't be able to hold out). Shepard, Zaeed and Garrus took on the Reaper. This story takes place following the voyage home. Miranda fans do not read! Comments/ suggestions for improvement welcome! It's a WIP so bare with me. :P_

The Normandy cruised pensively as it made its way back from the Omega 4 relay. Having no pressing need to use their FTL drives, despite the fact they were currently offline anyway because of the considerable damage the ship had sustained, the ship was due to dock at the Citadel in 0400 hours Standard Galactic Time.

The crew was busy working, repairing the ship to sustainable levels –particularly the damaged vital ship systems. Although they were shaken from their ordeal, Shepard had refused Miranda's suggestion that the crew should be allowed some time to relax and work through their mental scars. Kelly had professed her agreement with Miranda that that would be the best idea, so the crew would not have lingering psychological problems. Shepard, on the other hand, had concluded that they would have plenty of time to recover once they had reached the Citadel.

Commander Jane Shepard and all the surviving members of her team stood around the table in the Debriefing Room in silence. It was noticeably bare, with only the usual krogan, turian, mercenary and Cerberus Agent, as well as Shepard herself who stood at the fore of the table present from the attack of the Collector Base. Shepard's arms were crossed, as she stared down each of her team discerning their stances.

The turian was currently hard to read, staring back at Shepard as if deep in thought. Shepard had no idea what he was thinking, so she didn't try. Across the table from him stood Grunt, still covered in gore and looking immensely pleased with what they had just accomplished. Miranda stood next to him staring at a spot on the table. Shepard noticed the brooding hatred in her face, and recognised her act as an attempt to control her emotions.

"Do you have a problem, Miranda?" Shepard asked, her tone baring the slightest hint of provocation.

Miranda looked up from her spot on the table, attempting to keep her face as neutral as possible. Shepard and everyone else in the room could feel her agitation toward the Commander, however, and even Grunt seemed to be intrigued enough to look at her in interest.

She looked up at Shepard. "No, Commander. I just feel we could have done things better."

There was a palpable feeling lingering around the table. Shepard felt, which ignited anger into her, that the other members of her team knew exactly what Miranda was talking about. Fortunately, the looks on both the krogan's and Zaeed's faces showed they approved with what had happened, and Garrus looked like he knew better than to go against the Commander. Miranda looked to be alone in the defence. Shepard locked onto Miranda's gaze, letting her comment linger in the air between them, attempting to cow her with an uncompromising stare. Miranda held her ground and continued to meet her gaze, even without blinking.

"How do you suggest we could have done better, Lawson?" Shepard asked.

Miranda clasped her knuckles on the table. "Too many of us died, Shepard. A lot of those deaths could have been avoided. And quite frankly, I think you were _trying_ to get us killed. Allowing Jackob to go into the ducts, _Mordin_ to lead the second team, not to mention not upgrading the ships' shields-"

Shepard could feel her mouth almost turning at the corner into an amused smirk, but she held it back. All of her team were staring at her now.

"You're accusing me of deliberate negligence, Lawson? Treason?"

The Cerberus Agent finally blinked. She was accusing her superior, the greatest hero in human space faring history, of treason.

"N-no Commander" she stuttered.

She'd gotten Miranda to stutter! _Miranda_! Shepard thought.

Miranda unfurled her fists and stood up straight.

"I do not deny you got the job done. It's just that I disapprove of your meth-"

Shepard cut her off with a raised hand. "Was how I achieved the objective ever part of the agreement, Lawson? I don't think the Illusive man would say so."

Bold, she knew, but she was enjoying herself thoroughly. She knew she was right, and had Miranda trapped right where she wanted her.

Miranda couldn't suppress her glare any longer. Her lips pursed pensively. Shepard had hit a sore point in her, using the Illusive Man against her. And she too knew Shepard was right. She composed herself, pushing off against the table while still glaring at Shepard darkly. The Commander stood stoically, watching her from the head of the table.

"This is wrong, Shepard. You'll eventually get what you deserve."

With that, she strode out of the room, the door automatically closing behind her. Shepard turned her head to watch her go, and then turned back to her remaining squad members.

"Does anyone else have a problem?" She asked, as if Miranda had never been there. The others stood completely still. Not one deigned to speak.

"Dismissed." Commander Shepard spoke.


	2. Duty

Miranda stood in the hologram, in full view of the Illusive Man.

He snuffed his cigarette in the ash tray by his seat, looking up at Miranda with his artificially enhanced blue eyes.

"She betrayed Tali's father, let Koylat kill his target, and ignored practically everyone else's desires to find closure knowing full well they'd be in poor form for the suicide mission. She may be succeeding in the mission, but she's destroying everything else."

"Shepard's role is to find a way to defeat the Reapers. We're not asking her to do anything else." The Illusive Man responded. "I do not doubt you, Miranda. But I believe you've taken this on too personally. You're dwelling on past intentions. Just be glad that you did survive."

Miranda's face went tense and emotionless, like she always did when she felt someone was disagreeing with her.

"But she could do it again. Shepard doesn't like her plans going wrong. She's the type of person who fixates on something until she _does_ get it right." Miranda spoke. "She won't stop until she's exactly where she wants to be, with me dead."

The Illusive Man studied her calmly.

"So you're suggesting I take you off the team and reassign you to another project?"

Miranda nodded.

"That's what I'm asking."

"I believe in your skills, Ms. Lawson. I have full faith that you can deal with this outside problem while focusing on your actual goal. You'll stay with Shepard until the job is done."

"But…" Miranda feared the Illusive Man would cut her off, but she still had one more angle to press. "If I stay, Shepard's integrity will suffer as she tries to deal with me. The mission might be at stake." She tried, although her anxiety had become apparent in her voice.

The Illusive Man nodded. "That's a risk we're going to have to take. I chose you for the team because you have abilities which would be of use to Shepard. They are still more valuable than any integrity Shepard might lose from her mission to put on you."

Miranda held back a sigh as she instead searched the Illusive Man's face. She frowned a little.

"Fine. But if things get really bad, I'm going to defend myself." She admitted.

The Illusive Man nodded, but spoke:

"Just try not to jeopardize the mission with this. Otherwise it probably would have been better if you'd died."

The hologram went dead and Miranda found herself alone in the projector room. She stared at the floor, feeling agitated. The Illusive Man was willing to expend her for preserving Shepard's mission. She knew the Illusive Man always looked at the bigger picture, but she'd never thought he'd choose Shepard over her. Miranda would have to bring her to justice herself.

Shepard had asked EDI to track the whole voice audio to her private terminal. She'd had the authority to do so, ever since Joker had given her complete powers over the ship. However, Shepard could only hear the audio on Miranda's end. What the Illusive Man had said to her was behind a carefully constructed and impenetrable firewall. But from Miranda's reactions and statements, Shepard could tell the Illusive Man had told her to stay and help with the mission.

"That bitch ratted on me." She thought with the hint of amusement.

She turned off the recorder before Miranda caught on and recognized the Illusive Man's conversation hadn't been as secure as she'd trusted it would be.

Personally, Shepard didn't give a damn if Miranda left - all she wanted was for her to be off her ship, or at the very least to accept Shepard as her superior. But Miranda was stubborn and insubordinate; she'd never surrender to her. Shepard sat back in her seat and closed her eyes. She really did hate that bitch.


	3. Reflections

Shepard looked up in frustration from her issue of _Women's Marine Monthly_ as she heard the whoosh of her private quarter's door slide open. Her angered look from being disturbed quickly turned to one of surprise as Garrus stepped in. She closed the magazine, placing it on her desk face up to reveal a woman wielding powerful biotics on the cover, under which read the caption "_empower your biotics_", before turning in her chair to face him.

"Garrus?"

"Commander." He nodded in reply, coming over to stand in front of her and glanced casually at the cover of the magazine she'd been reading. He clasped his taloned hands behind his back, the corner of his mouth curling to reveal his sharp teeth. His blue eyes stared at her without blinking. Shepard understood his reservation to mean Garrus was reluctant to speak, so she spoke first.

"Something on your mind?"

Garrus bowed his head, mandibles twitching slightly before he looked up again to meet her gaze.

"I was just talking to Zaeed down in the cargo hold," he admitted. "He mentioned something which disturbed me."

"What's that?" Shepard asked flatly, her gaze never leaving the turian.

Garrus' gaze dropped back to the floor and he began pacing again.

"Speak up, soldier!" Shepard demanded, her tone increasing in anger. The turian's reserve was beginning to annoy her.

Garrus stopped and nodded once. "Well…" He started. His teeth were visible as he looked at her again. "He said you'd had the intention of betraying me back on the Citadel with Sidonis. I just wanted to know if that was true."

Shepard's scowling look quickly turned to one of dismay.

"Oh," was the only reply she gave before turning her head back to her desk and staring into space in front of her.

"Shepard. Be frank with me." Garrus became tense. His voice became more forceful as it was his turn to be angry. "Did you?"

"Yes, Garrus. But when we talked in the cab on the way there I changed my mind." Shepard did not turn to face him again.

Garrus' heart panged. He felt betrayed. The only thing he managed to get out was a simple, angry "Why?"

Shepard became defensive and turned to face him, her face alive in agitation. "Do I have to explain myself to you? Just leave me alone, Garrus."

Garrus' growing anger abated suddenly when he viewed the defensive look on Jane's face. He had not come into her room with the intention of upsetting her, he merely wanted answers. And something had just clicked inside him as he realised something from her look. He gave a small nod.

"That's all I wanted to know. Thank you Shepard," he said as he turned, hands still behind his back, and walked out the door.

Shepard placed her head between her elbows on her desk and scratched her hands through her hair, causing her hair to become unruly. She sighed and closed her eyes.

Garrus returned to his station by the battery. It was perhaps the least damaged part of the ship. He sure as hell was glad he hadn't been stationed down in Engineering like Tali and Jack had, when the Drive Core had exploded, causing major damage to rip through the lower decks of the _Normandy_.

Garrus idly tapped at the calibrations console as he mused on what he'd just discovered. He liked the Commander. He couldn't figure out why exactly, but her spirited nature and 'no shit' attitude had always appealed to him on some level. Sure, when he first met her on the Citadel he'd found her unruly and perhaps a little crazy, but he'd pinned it down to being typical human behaviour.

But the more he'd learned since about humans told him that the galaxy view of humans wasn't accurate at all. They weren't as ruthless and quick-acting as others who'd never really got to know them thought they were. They were a lot more complex. And he'd just figured out that even Shepard, rash and unpredictable, perhaps even a little suicidal, was just as complex, if not the most complex person he'd met during his now considerable experience with humans.

She was also like him. She didn't let anything stop her, and always achieved justice, even if her justice was a little different from his. He admired that about her. He couldn't say he approved of all of her rash actions, but he did enjoy getting the bad guy at the end. And he also admired her strength. She wouldn't let anything hold her down, not even after finding her allegiance to her worst enemy. She'd just figure it out again, until she was back on her own terms and a little further ahead then she had been before it had all started.

He'd found a deep respect for her, and had found himself cringing every time he saw the look on her face he'd come to recognise as pain buried deep within her psyche. He was certain not even she knew about it. Which was what Garrus had just seen in her eyes. He felt long ago she'd shut herself off from the pains of life, and now she was merely living as a response to it. Her reckless nature and apparent disregard for life was rooted from a deeply ingrained distrust, perhaps even fright of the galaxy. He'd known she'd lived on Earth as an orphan. He could only guess how horrible that had been for her. Turians mostly held their family close to them, despite Garrus' own remoteness from his father. And then, when Shepard had gotten the strength to drag herself out of that shithole, a few years later she was shot down again when her entire unit died on Akuze thanks to none other than Cerberus. He felt sorry for her. Hell, he felt sympathy for her.

Garrus clutched the side of the calibrations console as he looked up into the battery. There was one more thing. When she'd looked at him so defensively, it was like he'd looked into her soul and seen just how frightened she actually was. A sense of protectiveness welled up within the turian as he considered her.

And despite her intentions to betray him with Sidonis, she hadn't. She'd changed her mind at the last moment and had stopped him from making a mistake which would have changed him into a monster. She'd acted completely out of character at that moment, all because… because they were friends. They were all either of them had to each other in this whole damned galaxy. And then she had ensured he lived through the suicide mission when she'd seen the rest of her squad as expendable.

His mandibles twitched. _No_, he thought, _I think I get it now._


	4. Conflicting Authorities

"Ah, Commander. Thank you for coming."

"What is it, Lawson. I'm busy you know."

"Of course, Commander. This should only take a moment."

Shepard waited for her to speak.

She cleared her throat before starting.

"I received news you'd changed trajectories from the Citadel, choosing to remain in the Omega cluster. I just wanted to know what your reasons were." Miranda explained, trying to keep the tone in her voice as polite as possible. If the Illusive Man wanted her to remain in Shepard's crew, she was damn well going to make sure it happened.

Shepard stood against the door, her hand to her mouth in a contemplating gesture as she studied her XO. Her synthetically enhanced eyes glowed red. It kind of reminded Miranda of the synthetic optics in the Illusive Man's own eyes, although she hated to admit it. And she and her team had put them there. She almost couldn't contain the desire to convulse at that thought, but she kept her face neutral toward Shepard.

_God, if I'd known what I do now back then, I'd never have agreed to do this._

After a few moments of Miranda staring at her, Shepard finally moved her arm.

"I want repairs to take the shortest time possible. Would a Fuelling Depot suffice?"

Miranda shook her head. "I would suggest reconfirming our original course to the Citadel. Fuelling Depots have limited resources."

"They can fix ships."

"The Normandy needs entire new parts which only a major colony would be able to supply. Besides that, I've already had the engineers take stock of what we need and put the orders in with a contact of Cerberus to get them. They should be ready to collect at the Citadel in…"

"Wait, you're saying we have to wait for the _orders_ to come in, never mind_ installing_ them?" Shepard interjected.

"That is correct." Miranda nodded.

Shepard looked irritated (more than usual), and took a step back toward the wall.

"How long will it take?" She asked flatly.

"According to the contact the total time it will take for all of the orders to be ready will be…" She typed something into her computer. "…3 weeks." She winced, anticipating the Commander's response.

It was not immediately forthcoming.

"And then how long will they take to install?" Shepard asked.

"Anything up to 2 weeks, considering the damage we've sustained." Miranda clarified.

"So… about 5 weeks total. 5 weeks we lose sitting idle while the Reapers find a way to destroy the whole damned galaxy."

"We need to do it, Commander. Can you suggest another way?"

Shepard eyed her, a mutual intense dislike of one another relaying between them.

"I can, actually. We go to Omega instead. It's much closer than the Citadel. If our parts are so _rare_, buying the parts from the brokers ourselves and not doing any of this waiting shit would work. I'm sure we could find what we need in Omega's markets."

"You're talking about underground dealerships." Miranda clarified. "That's illegal."

"Doing illegal things has never bothered you and Cerberus before." The statement was most definitely meant to be accusatory. "Besides, Cerberus pretending they're several different buyers isn't exactly legal either."

"But you're not a Spectre anymore, Shepard. You can't just go around doing things like dealing with illegal goods."

"Nobody would know."

"They would suspect. Isn't it better to keep as clean a reputation as possible?"

"I can compromise my reputation for mine and the galaxy's lives."

Miranda couldn't contain her sigh.

Shepard paced forward again, placing her hands flat on Miranda's desk and staring directly at her.

"So they're both illegal. What's so different? We either get the parts in a few days, or a month."

"Shepard, you're not seeing the whole picture clearly. Omega likely wouldn't even have most of the parts we need. This ship's top of the line."

Shepard started to say something, stopped, then pushed off the desk in annoyance.

"I'm not going to sit idle for 5 weeks. But fine. Continue the order. I'll find something else to do while my ship is down."

"… I'm glad you've come to see logic, Commander." She was trying so hard not to sound sarcastic.

Shepard gave her a funny look, then made for the door. She paused as she reached it, looking back at the XO.

"We'll dock at the Citadel."

She stepped out the door, which automatically closed behind her.

"Citadel it is," Miranda said flatly as the door shut completely.

Shepard exited Miranda's office, striking up the comm to Joker. "Joker, change of plans again. Our resident Cerberus operative has informed me we need to go to the Citadel after all."

"Geez Commander. If you change your mind one more time, I'm going on strike."

"You'll have plenty of time not to work." Shepard muttered.

"Eh?"

"Just focus on piloting, mister."


	5. Blame

Miranda sat down with a heavy sigh, displeased with how the current events had gone. She knew she was nearing the edge of her emotional tether… Shepard was getting to her. One more straw… And…

Her eyes gazed down at her flashing terminal. A new message. She opened it, her eyes darting quickly over the page.

_Agent 406, we are sorry to inform you Project Off-World was a failure. Eclipse Mercenaries managed to invade before the operation was complete. Persons of interest were re-transferred to an unknown Eclipse base and out of Cerberus notice. Cerberus Operatives maintaining the mission were killed._

Miranda jumped to her feet, banging the table with the palms of her hands. She quickly moved out of her office, catching up to Shepard with long strides. She grabbed the Commander's shoulder, spinning the woman about, an angry scowl spreading across her lips. Several crew in the mess stopped to stare at her. Shepard was glaring at her with a dangerous flash in her eyes.

"My sister and her family are missing, thanks to you," Miranda growled, her hand still clutched tightly around the Commander's shoulder.

Shepard slapped it off, glaring right back at her, a frown forming on her own lips.

"That's Cerberus' fault for not accounting for a possible interference. Not mine."

Miranda's face flushed red, growing more angry. Her eyes searched Shepard's with hate.

"I asked you if we could oversee it. We could have stopped them."

"We were busy."

Miranda grew exasperated.

"Not busy enough for Zaeed or Garrus, or Thane or Tali."

She paused, staring past Shepard into space, her frown becoming deeper.

"Then again, maybe its better you didn't go. You'd just have screwed things up."

Miranda turned away from Shepard, who stood still, the situation fully unravelling itself to her. She spoke to the Operative's back.

"I did what had to be done in all of those cases. You don't like the way I handled it? That's your call."

"The refinery workers on Zorya?"

"Vido would have gotten away if we'd extinguished the fires. And I didn't set the refinery alight, Zaeed did.

"Allowing Koylat to take his mark?"

Shepard dipped her head. "Nothing I could have done about it."

"Tali?"

"She was acquitted of the charges against her. I merely told the truth. Are you done, Miranda?"

The Cerberus Operative turned back to her, and she seemed hot and flustered.

"The Suicide Mission?"

Shepard's smile widened.

"Finally we come full circle." She bowed her head. "Yes, using you to maintain the biotic barrier was a big mistake. I'm sorry Thane died when I dragged your ass to safety. I admit to my poor judgement there."

Miranda looked dangerous, but Shepard stood, cold as ice.

"Thane's death might not have been planned, but other choices were. What about sending Jacob through the ducts?"

"He made it, didn't he? It was a freak bullet to the head that killed him."

"The whole point was to open the door. If it was done sooner, by a tech expert, he wouldn't have been shot."

Shepard shrugged.

"It's not my fault you lot don't like each other, didn't want to follow Samara's or Mordin's orders. It's not my fault Samara was killed getting the crew back to safety. And…" her grin grew wider "It's not my fault you survived."

Miranda scowled. "I would've died too if Grunt wasn't with me."

"Duly noted. Next time I won't make that mistake."

Miranda started pacing, trying to find some way to take Shepard down, to prove her motive. She looked up.

"It's not your fault for all of this, you say. It's also not your fault that Garrus and Zaeed held firm to you, and performed outstandingly, and hence managed to survive, and because they were so primed that you had better protection yourself. I admit as well as anyone there was a fair amount of risks involved, but on top of them, you still shaped events to how you wanted. In the end, Shepard, the way it went _was_ your fault. Even if nobody else in this whole damned galaxy sees that, I will. I swear, I will."

Shepard's eyes narrowed, as did Miranda's, and, at that, Miranda turned on her heel and stomped back into her office, the door closing behind her. Shepard could feel the ire pouring out even through the solid bulkhead.

Ah, another victory. She could get very, very used to this.

Finally, the string that had been holding her attention toward Miranda snapped, and she looked around at the group that had gathered to watch Miranda's little outburst. Several of the crew dissipated, now the fight was over. Some remained, and she eyed them a moment before turning dismissively.

"Back to work, all of you," she stated clearly. She made her way back to the elevator, talk beginning to pick up behind her.


End file.
